There aren’t that many bloggers that I “listen to”… Sure, I read quite a few and even share beliefs with some of them. But really listen to? Two-Maybe three at best.  Yet there’s one that I know absolutely nothing about-not a shred of casual aquaintence-and I know, really know, that we must have either been seperated at birth or just haven’t met yet to plan the wedding…

“ If you have ever hurt, struggled, been angry, frightened, confused or felt misunderstood; and you live, love and laugh (or want to), you might find a part of one of us inside of you.”

And there’s the kicker, “One of us…”

You see Trailer Park Barbie isn’t a “she”…. TPB is a “them”.

Trailer Park Barbie is made up of  FOUR women, and while one did go by the Barbie name on the Trailer Park Barbie Blog, she now goes by UM (Unquiet Mind-Haven’t read it? Go to a Bookstore. Now. If you can relate to the authors experience in a parking lot at UCLA, well…you belong. Not sure where-but you definitely belong.)

So it would seem that I am infatuated with a group. Not sure what that means or where it may lead, but I’m putting it out there for all to see. Yep-good, bad, or indifferent…I’m all about Bi-Polar Chicks Blogging.

If you’re like me at all-narcissistic, manic-depressive, lithium-licker and recovering addict, and too much more to mention right now, then I have a feeling that there’s a place in your heart (soul?) for TPB too. But more importantly, a safe, healing place that let’s you know-immediately-that you are not alone.

Pay them a visit-You’ll have a new addiction in no time…  

Why is it that real, gut-wrenching grief is so difficult to handle in other people?  Why is is that we can respond to broken bones but pretend that broken hearts are unimportant?

Just imagine that… Why is it that real, gut-wrenching grief is so difficult to handle in other people?  Why is is that we can respond to broken bones but pretend that broken hearts are unimportant?

Just imagine that you are paddling your canoe down a river, watching the birds and bees and butterflies.  You are so relaxed and enchanted that you don’t see the approaching cliff fall.  Your canoe hurtles over the edge and you tumble 30 feet or more trying to puzzle out what is happening to you.  You land badly and end up with broken limbs, but fortunately you have people around you and you are treated promptly.  The pain is real, but nobody complains that you can’t play sport that Sunday, or tells you to stop being silly and to pull yourself together.

For people who experience significant loss, the pain is devastating, though there are no broken bones to show on the surface.  Imagine suddenly falling 30 feet in a canoe – something that was somehow normal and safe suddenly disappears.  The loved-one suddenly dies, the job or health suddenly vanishes.  All significant losses are terrifying, shocking, painful.  But supposing no-one can see the real pain.  Supposing people want you to carry on as normal and then criticize you and accuse you of being self-indulgent when you cannot.

I had some significant conversations with a family recently who had a son who was killed by a drug overdose.  Months later, they are still trying to cope, still struggling to carry on with life, still hoping the pain will somehow ease, still trying to hold down a job and run a family.  They are both hurting and numbed.  Their whole perspective has changed.  Many things that were previously important have now become trivia making them angry.  Slowly they are edging towards a new normality without their son, but the healing of the internal wounds is understandably slow, and the internal trauma has left them emotionally weakened, tired, vulnerable.

Broken Within

On a recently discovered marketing blog that I will be reading more often, Nomadishere comments on Hallmark Greeting Cards attempts to make a few sheckles from the misery, pain and suffering that are addiction.

But since the treatment centers have been doing it themselves for years (1-800-Cocaine late night TV ads, Betty Ford Alumni t-shirts and hats are at the innocent end of the spectrum), Hallmark is actually quite late to the Addiction Sells party…

The story:

Hallmark Tries to Capatilize on Drug Addiction, Cancer and Other Hardships

The response:

Is Hallmark really any different than the 12 Step groups and their “cute” slogans?

ONE ADDICT HELPING

Alcoholism Has Genetic Basis

A new study, published in a recent issue of Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research, reports what most people with alcohol use disorder (AUD) or “alcoholism” have known for a very long time:  that alcoholism runs in families.  The researchers studied the different variables that affect one’s ability to develop AUD.  In many cases, the results were not surprising.

AUD is 4-8 times more common in those who have a family history of alcoholism as compared to those who don’t.  The researchers defined “family history” as having one or both parents having an alcohol problem. 

Other predictors of alcohol use disorder were male gender and a trait known as “behavioral disinhibition”.  Having this trait means that an individual has a tendency toward wanting immediate smaller rewards and doesn’t consider the longterm negative consequences of an act.  Those with behavioral disinhibition are more likely to experiment earlier with alcohol and other drugs; they are also less likely to moderate their use.

Individuals in the study also underwent tests assessing their overall working memory and their tendency to gamble.  Alcoholics showed more problems with working memory and were more likely to take risks in a gambling challenge.

While the study confirms several previous findings regarding family history and AUD, it supports the prevailing concept that biology and genetics are major factors in the development of the disorder. Such knowledge may be able to predict those who are likely to develop the disorder in order to intervene as early as possible. 

This immediately brings up two important thoughts:

1. No Shit.
2. I could have told you all of that for a lot less than you spent; and a lot quicker as well…

(How come you never see studies or interviews with “hope-to-die” junkies and addicts? You know-the ones who aren’t afraid of hell because they’ve already been there?)